i'm peeling off the dull grey layers that you've plastered on me
and revealing the flamboyant vibrant hues and silky pastels
that were so slyly hinding underneath my complaisant hull.
i'm realising what you've been doing to me, and understanding.
this, the sudden urge to scream bursting from silent facades
like a tulip from the dusty shell of a chalky pistachio
leaving behind paper thin layers of complacency
in the molting skin of the shriveled creature who had eaten my soul
and refused to release the quivering thing from its pockmarked hands.
i am changing while you are away. i am becoming more of myself,
constantly reshaping and refining with pickaxe and sledgehammer
and sandpaper fine as sea salt. paper shavings and wood chips
fly from my willing canvas as the fears chipped from my heart.
where have i been before? all this time i've hidden from this lifeline,
this pulsing throb of love and anger which so captivates?
your eyes are piercing but they seek not truth, only velvety lies
which build walls of uncertainty brick by brick only to be destroyed.
do you realize that i could leave you this instant?
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