at one point in your life you will realize that
the world will not fall apart in your absence.
i was sixteen, staring at the racks of Calvin Klein
sundresses and realizing that i could no longer
close my fingers around my upper arm.
inharmonious bursts of air conditioning swirled
like sandstorms, fluttering the price tags on two pairs
of slick Marc Jacobs flats.
and that's when i realized that life is like
an exceptionally difficult game of solitaire
which one must play against oneself, and may not restart,
and cannot win.
the cards which i had been given were strange & unrecognizable,
and i was burning them.
i was setting them on fire to keep warm the one i loved.
i stared, something saccharine flitting behind the floor
like frightened fish.
and i bent towards the linoleum, and i bit my tongue hard,
and i put out that fire.
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